Quotes
"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people." --Conan O'Brien
"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!" . . . Jay Leno
For every person with a spark of genius, there are a hundred with ignition trouble.
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -Winston Churchill
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." -Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" -Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." -Moses Hadas
"His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open." -Howard Hughes (about Clark Gable
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." -Paul Keating
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know." -Abraham Lincoln
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." -Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge." -Thomas Brackett Reed
"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them." -James Reston (about Richard Nixon)
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -Charles, Count Talleyrand
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -Mark Twain
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -Mae West
"She is a peacock in everything but beauty." -Oscar Wilde
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." -Billy Wilder
"It's like deja vu all over again." -- Yogi Berra
My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character. ? Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself "the Charles Barkley of figure skating"
When you come to a fork in the road, take it. - Yogi Berra
There's only one thing better than getting what you want, and that's getting what you want and pissing someone else off at the same time. -Bender on Futurama
"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal." - Henry Ford
"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it" - Henry David Thoreau
The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for." -Allan K. Chalmers
"Happiness is seeing the muscular lifeguard all the girls were admiring leave the beach hand in hand with another muscular lifeguard." -Johnny Carson
"Bad things are not the worst that can happen to us. NOTHING is the worst that can happen to us." Richard Bach, One
"Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed, but with what is still possible for you to do." Pope John XXIII
"Like rock 'n' roll, school shootings were also invented by blacks and stolen by the white man." Chris Rock
It?s not that I?m lazy -- it?s that I just don?t care. (Peter Gibbons, Office Space)
"What's the point in being able to talk, if you gotta keep secrets." Donkey from Shrek
